The Emotional Burden

A lot has been discussed about the physical exhaustion of being a doctor and especially a resident, but it is important to acknowledge the emotional side as well. Doctors willingly surround themselves with sick people. Every day when we go in, we immerse ourselves in our patient's sorrow, grieving, stress, fear, and uncertainty. And even though we try our best to relieve pain and suffering, to cure illness and debility, those emotions and experiences of our patients affect us.

It is the young and sick who affect me most. A man my age is hit by a car in a crosswalk. A young woman with two kids has a newly diagnosed invasive cervical cancer. A medical student undergoes surgery for obstructive sleep apnea. In the quiet moments of anesthesia, I wax philosophical. How lucky I am to be healthy. Yet anyone, no matter their age or how they care for themselves, could have some dormant illness yet undiagnosed. How sudden life can change if one gets into an accident or if that lingering cold turns out to be something more sinister. All our well-laid plans go to dust.

It is important for physicians to care for themselves physically and emotionally. I must not let those awful and rare circumstances, diseases, and injuries I see occupy my mood for the entire day. We must not hide our emotions, but we must not let our mood overwhelm us. The feelings we have when we care for patients echo the reasons why we go into medicine, but letting them overtake us is to succumb to illness ourselves.