Medical Student Burnout

Recently, the idea of medical student burnout has made the lay press. A few articles in the New York Times and other places allude to the fact that medical school is tough. The hours, the emotional impact, the hierarchical hazing, the overwhelming amount of information, and the intimidating responsibility all contribute to poor self esteem, unhappiness, and the wish that we had picked a different career. Some studies cite a suicidal ideation rate of 10%. It's quite scary, and I think that it's not far from the truth. There are times when I feel stressed, depressed, anxious, under-appreciated, alone. I've had moments when I've wondered about choosing this path and played the "sunk cost" economics game of whether it's too late to cut my losses and go practice law or something.

But in reflecting on this, I don't think my experience has been that bad. In general, I'm having a great time. On the previous call night, I felt exhilarated by the intellectual excitement my patients generated and though I was up at 2 in the morning, I was happy. A nap, a presention to the attending, then back to sleep. It killed my Saturday, but honestly I didn't mind. It's something more than work, this commitment that I've made to my patients to take care of them, this commitment I've made to myself to learn. I could get an extra hour of sleep every morning, but resident report is really fun, and I'm happy waking early to go. I haven't even turned to coffee yet.

It's true that there were rough times, especially in rotations I didn't particularly enjoy. I am looking forward to winter break. I wouldn't mind an extra day off or two. But when I'm at work, I can't complain. I feel appreciated by my team, I advocate for my patients, I am eager to learn. I think my personality was made to be a student. Or perhaps I haven't realized yet how much easier it is to put away that cap and gown.