Men

It's pretty interesting seeing how different husbands (or boyfriends or fathers of the baby or significant others) act during their wife's (or girlfriend's) labor, delivery, and C-section. Some want nothing to do with it, are afraid of seeing anything, spend their time getting coffee. Others try to be helpful and supportive, almost to a fault; they are the ones who bring up every detail they read in a book or heard in a class. Sometimes, they can be destructive, yelling at their partners, becoming frustrated with the process, unable to empathize with the woman's experience. I had one husband who, throughout an entire C-section, was on his phone. I also had another husband who answered all the questions for his wife, refusing to let her speak for herself; in fact, I wasn't sure she understood English until I had a moment with her alone and asked. And there are husbands who are the opposite; their wives order them around with ferocity. Many husbands parade cameras around, even as their wives are in intense pain.

It's a weird world, and everyone adapts to it differently. For some couples, pregnancy and childbirth may be the first big stressor. I hope that with each relationship, both people find the right roles for them to best support their partner.