Sleep

Sleep has really become a luxury and premium. There is so much I could write about it, but all my thoughts are scattered. I get a generous amount of sleep each night, but I think I get behind when I'm on call. Call can be brutal; we go in expecting to stay awake 30 hours (and then drive home afterward). Even if we do get that precious two or three hours of rest, it is constantly interrupted by pages, fraught with the stress of patient care, and unfulfilling given the furniture provided. I was told to try to get at least an hour because it makes the post-call day so much easier, and it's true. But I would never call it an hour of restful sleep; it's merely an attempt to stave off exhaustion.

As I tread into my third (out of five) straight call months, I can easily say that I am more tired than I have ever been. I crave sleep so, so much, and it's hard for me to remember what it's like not to be exhausted. Sleep is slowly overtaking everything in terms of priority; I know I have calls to return, emails to write, an apartment to clean, a future to plan, and each day I procrastinate a little more. I need to take one of my coveted days off simply to catch up on everything: blogs, correspondence, chores, errands, and sleep. This is a strange, strange life, and I'm not sure how many people know what it's like before they get into it.

I know I've been writing several self-pitying blogs, but I'm really going to get out of this rut, I promise.